At 6am, I awake to the first ring of my alarm, foggily switching it off, grabbing my pillow & shuffling my feet along to the spare bedroom where my mat, blanket & laptop are waiting for me. A dear inner dancer has shared their new soundscape and I want to journey with it whilst in the hypnogogic state. During a recent intensive with Pi, we began each morning with innerdance, enjoying the fruits of this blended consciousness. It is too early in my own studies for me to say if there is an optimal time to innerdance; what I do know is that beginning my day in this way evokes a sense of wellness & fulfilment in me that it feels like the most natural way to wake up to myself.
I press play & lie down, comfying myself onto my back with my cosy, favoured blanket. Sounds come, beckoning me to follow them. This soundscape is fresh to me, a collection of vibrations I have never experienced before and I feel delight at a cellular level. Throughout the journey, I have a clear sense of my heart, I notice a deep appreciation for this inner dancer and their uniqueness communicating through their choice of sounds. Muscles soften and I imagine every inch of me is smiling internally. Throughout the 60 minutes, I am gently traversing a liminal space with a particular clarity which is neither sharp nor clouded at the edges. As the music ebbs into itself, I stir with a feeling of peace and love for this creator. From what I am learning about the brain (and this is a foggy, cobwebby brain state), it is the posterior cingulate within the limbic system which perceives & processes emotional stimuli and it may also be a player when it comes to generating compassion & admiration, particularly within spiritual experiences and practices where intense worship or compassion is felt.
Later that day, I take some time for authentic movement as a way to seek out information about innerdance which reside within subconscious realms. This particular somatic practice, rooted in active imagination, supports the body to actualise unconscious material kinaesthetically. I light a candle, welcoming in the past, the present & the future as witness bearers and moving companions. I step into the middle of the space, noticing that my feet want to be on the ridge of the rug, cupped at the arches by the elevated material. Eyes close as arms are moved upwards. I feel an internal inner galaxy swirling within as I move through a spiralling timespace. I am turned in all directions, limbs finding their own ways, a chaotic marionette. I smile...This is innerdance. Questions arise & fall away without form to anchor them. The pace is faster than I can consciously track. I imagine innerdance as a ballet, as legs twist & toes point, an elegance of embodiment; movement ebbs & I feel elation, sadness, fatigue, fulfilment, a sweet nibble of so many emotions before my arms gravitate to the ground, followed by cranium. It is as if my head shall descend into the portal of the rug but the alarm sounds, pulling me back into the ordinary. I take time to mark make in support of my return and integration, capturing the essence of my experience through the shapes and colours within this continued small dance. I am becoming more attuned to the ubiquity of innerdance. It appears to me as a sacred geometry which is present in all things. What a delicious inquiry to delve in to :)